Sunday, October 12, 2008

Just A Little Crazy, I Hope.

I thought I was doing so good. I am sure all of you know that my mom died in August. I have missed her and found myself thinking about her more than ever, but over all, I feel like I have been keeping it together pretty well. I have been relying heavily on candy. Pounds of it. Eating so much everyday that I am pretty sure I have diabetes from all of it. I had been feeling physically terrible, as I am sure you could imagine. My stomach is begging for something better so I decided I wasn't going to buy any more candy. I thought I was ready. I ran out yesterday, and I have been a wreck ever since. I don't know how much of it is detox and how much of it is out of control emotion that hasn't ever been dealt with properly. I had gotten some Jelly Bellies yesterday that I was saving for Tom (they are the only candy he really enjoys.) I ate some, too many, but thinking about how I had let myself down made it unfulfilling. I am not going to eat anymore today. Instead, I am going to post this super depressing post. A catharsis of pent up emotion, to save myself a bazillion calories and an upset stomach.
I don't want you to take me so seriously. I am not posting this for pity. I hope you all put something funny to break the tension. It can be cruel and insensitive too. I think that would make me feel better. I know you all feel sorry for me.
Fruit snacks don't count as candy...right?
This is a picture of my mom full of life.

6 comments:

ManicMandee said...

Katie, I've had the same problem as you before! I can't tell you how to fix it because I'm not sure if I'm totally over it yet. But I hope you can and feel better soon. The first step is admitting it right? Good luck!

Katie said...

You should go back and read how many times you said you were giving up candy. I think it's time for an aggressive intervention.

BTY we all know that "candy" is code for heroin.

Yes this is Tom and I love you.

Hot Pants said...

Everyone has their addictions. Like ManicMandee is addicted to running. That can't be healthy.

Julie said...

Wow that picture of mom is one I haven't seen. I can't beleive how much Ben looks like Dad. It is a little scary. Katie, just buy the candy and say it is for when I come over. That way you will be prepared for a party when I am there, and I, unfortunately am not there very often.

Ethan said...

Just like my mom said it is amazing and a little scary that ben looks like grandpa. Yes I like candy too but i am not obsessed. I've got like 2 P.S. k? I hope u can get over the candy obsesion Aunt Katie! I love ya!

bye bye ppl!


P.S. mom if u think its unfortunate just go to katie's house more if its ok with her!!!


P.S.#2 katie is it ok???

Jenny ESP said...

Put on some depressing music and wallow in despair for a while. That always helps me. You don't want to get cavities, right? So find a new addiction.

PS. raisins and marshmallows aren't candy either. And neither is a spoonful of frosting or pouring powdered sugar directly into your mouth.